A few things I realized today:

1. I need a better attitude towards my job. I spend at least 30/40 hours a week pissed off, irritated, (or trying not to be), or gossiping about people. I'm too young and underpaid to be stressed at some bullshit job. And as far as the gossiping thing, if I can do it, what's to stop others from gossiping about me??? (Not that they'll have a whole lot to talk about). Unlike some people, I do not reveal my deepest secrets to any and everyone.

2. I cannot be with someone who does not respect his mother. It'll be one thing if she was a horrible, crack-whore mom, but she's one of the sweetest people I've met and she does so much for him. The way he talks to her sometimes makes me cringe. I would never ever dream of using some of the words he uses around her in front of my mom....I can just feel her handprint on my face just thinking about it. The sad part about it is he doesn't realize he's being disrespectful, which makes me think that if he can do it to his mom, why not me???

3. I can do better!!! No. 3 was supposed to be my lucky number, "THE ONE," (Is the comma supposed to go inside the quotation mark or outside? I never really paid attention in English class). Anyway, it was rather disappointing. It wasn't that he didn't try; I just came to the conclusion that I can do a whole lot better. Even with all the drama, I'd have to say that No. 2 was more exciting. Speaking of No. 2, it’s so easy to fall back into old, familiar routines or situations. But I'm wiser (at least I like to think that I am), and like I said before, "I CAN DO BETTER!!!"

New Colors

I'm generally not fond of bright colors so I'm not sure if I'll keep it this way.

Thanksgiving's over. I tried not to eat too much. Only had one plate of food and dessert. The day was quite, just 7 of us at dinner. After dinner, I watched Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban



with my little cousin. Even though it isn't as dark as the book, I guess because of the PG rating, its my favorite of the series so far. I think the scene in which a Dementor first appeared, scared the hell out of my cousin. Hehe. One of my favorite characters wasn't in the movie, not even a mention of him, and of course Dumbledore was played by someone else; Richard Gambon. I guess it's because I was used to seeing Richard Harris in that role. I also watched The Gods Must Be Crazy 2



Like the prequel, a low budget, slapstick comedy, set in the Kalahari Desert. The funniest scene involved a New York Lawyer, her water cup, and a baboon.

Slap That Ho!

Christmas carols at 7:00a.m!!! Not a fun way to start the day. Since when did we start celebrating Christmas before Thanksgiving??? And when I got to work Barbara was playing more carols!!! The only thing that made it bearable was that it was the Jackson 5 Christmas album. The evil, Oompa-Loompas supervisor (Janet, not Barbara), was being a bitch today. I can't stand the little midget.

Anyways, yesterday was a quiet day. Spent the day cleaning, trying to fix this blog, playing Sims 2, watching movies. Movies I watched this weekend; The Stepford Wives (entertaining, kinda weird), The Chronicles of Riddick (who told Van Diesel he could act), and Highway with Jared Leto and Jake Gyllenhaal.




Random movie I added to my netflix queue coz it had Jared Leto in it. I forgot how cute he can be (ignore the mohawk in the movie). Anyways after I stopped drooling, I realized it was a good movie, surprisingly. Well that's all for now. Till tomorrow, bitches.

I like the new template. I have to work on the color scheme later this week. I'm thinking shades of blue and red, maybe???

Experimenting with colors and links....hopefully i don't screw it up too bad.

Orlando bloom- well done!!! You got the young good looker, here's your Mr. Perfect


*Which Hollywood hunk is 4 u?(with sexy pics) 4 new added
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I knew it. We are destined to be together. I'm bored....can't sleep. Time for a movie marathon. Hopefully I'll fall asleep before 3a.m.

The relationship started out well. He was very nice, charming, and caring, but I would soon fond out different. After a few months, I allowed him to move in with me, and that's when things took a turn for the worst. The arguments began and it started with just yelling back and forth, and then one day he choked me. I immediately packed up and moved out of my home. He called trying to get back together and I agreed only to meet with him to talk. When we did meet, he started making threats about things he would do to me and my family members if I refused to take a ride with him.

After a couple of hours of riding and talking, he started driving toward I-95 South. When I asked him where we were going, he told me that he was going to visit family. That day he kidnapped me and took me to Greenville, South Carolina from Washington, D.C., where I had no family or friends. I was always under his watchful eye and unable to call my family until a few days later from a pay phone. I alerted my family informing them of my whereabouts, and that I was unharmed. He kept me there living in a room with his family for four months. He made sure I had no money and he took the car every time he left.

When I finally got the courage to leave and go home, that would be the night I would fight for my life. He found four dollars in my wallet and that was all it took. He stabbed me, tried to set me on fire, and finally he shot me. He aimed for my head and I pushed his hand when the shot was fired so I was struck in the neck, instead of my head.

I was shot at point blank range with a 9mm handgun. The bullet missed my spine by a fraction of an inch. I have been left with physical and emotional scars.

I am a victim of a very violent domestic crime and I am blessed to be alive.

This man is currently on the run for 2 attempted murders (in South Carolina and D.C.), hitting a child while driving (in D.C.), and numerous charges ranging from Federal threats, Kidnapping, Robbery, Assault & Murder.

This article came off the fax machine at work on Wednesday. It was written by the victim's sister. Of course we all know the victim.....a former coworker, only 19 years old. I remember the week she disappeared. I hadn't seen her around for a couple of days, and although she missed work on a regular basis, it was unlike her to be gone for days at a time. She used to be Barbara's assistant, and it was Barbara who told me that she'd "moved" to South Carolina. Everyone who knew her really well was confused. We'd just recently found out that she was in an abusive relationship. So why would she move out of town with him??? I also remember the day she was shot. I was home and I got a text message on my phone from Nikki, "Calinda was shot by her boyfriend, she's in the hospital in critical condition, and he's on the run." I remember praying for her and I still do even though I'm beginning to think its pointless. I'll explain why in a second.

Calinda's doing a lot better than we expected. Although she has a very visible and hideous scar along her neck, and a few other deformities, she's out and about, looking for a new job, trying to go back to school. She visits NHPME almost every week, sometimes several times a week. But this is why I say my prayers and everyone else's might be pointless. The article had several pictures of him, one of which was a picture taken from Americas Most Wanted. One of her best friends told me that she knew he was wanted for attempted murder when they started dating. He did the same thing to his "baby mama" when she broke up with him. She also knew about the hit & run, but yet she continued to date him and even let him move in.

Wednesday she was at the pharmacy, talking to Wimpy, and his mother comes in the store. Calinda had told his family that she couldn't walk. She tells his mother that she lives in VA, and that she's doing a lot better. Now this is what I'm confused about. His mom tells her that she'd spoken with him and he regrets what happened and that he wanted to apologize to her. So she gives his mom her cellphone number and asks her to pass it on to him. Are we, women that is, that crazy and stupid when it comes to love???

Does she really think he regrets what happened??? Or maybe she thinks that it'll never happen again??? Does she not realize that when the police arrest him, if she's with him, she'll be an accessory??? For a 19yr old she's been through a lot, even before she met him. She was abused by a lot of different men and maybe that's part of the problem. She still loves him and I believe given the opportunity she'd get back together with him.

4 more days to go. I can't believe I'm complaining and its only Monday!!! Today was a drag. I'm beginning to detest weekdays, the work-week needs to be shorter....3 day weekends for all. Speaking of weekends, I'm afraid I might be falling back into old habits. I'll get to that in a second.

Saturday, went shopping with Cnot and Mon. Overall it was a good day. We saw a movie (Bridget Jones), funny, entertaining, good movie. Then we spent the rest of the day shopping. It was fun to hang out, catch up, but if you're not an avid shopper, I don't recommend you spend more than 5 hours at the mall. The place is a mad house. All my Christmas shopping will be done online, and if I'm forced to go back, it'll be early in the morning on a weekday.

Ok now back to the old habit. One word: Goonga! I don't know what to say. I wouldn't say its a bad habit....just an old habit. I choose to believe that I've learnt my lesson, that I've matured, that I know what to and what not to expect, but I might be in denial, and not realize that I'm an idiot....sigh. We barely spoke to each other for about 7 months, and in a matter of weeks, things are back to the way they were....well not exactly. We've grown apart. I don't feel the need to speak to him all the time, or see him all the time, which means that I won't miss him as much when he's not around. That might seem like a cruel thing to say, but its true. I do like hanging out with him, but not all the time. We're both single, we both need space, and we're free to do whatever we want.

As far as doing whatever we want......I think I need some sort of pill that can curb my libido. Is there such a thing??? I need to do some research. This is why I get stuck in situations that take me too long to get out of!!! Another sigh! Maybe I need a replacement for Adam, he's not up to par anymore.

And what am I supposed to do about my ex??? Today he accused me of being abusive while we were together. He said I was mean and hurtful because I broke up with him twice and that I tried to kill him. Well the second part's kinda true, but it was an accident and it wouldn't have killed him. I bought a massager for him because he was always complaining about his back, and there's only so much my hands can do. Anyways, the first time I tried it on him, I asked if I could turn it all the way up to see how strong the impulses got, "Sure!" he said. A second later, he starts screaming, "Turn that fucking thing off!!!." I turn it off, yank the pads off him, and he gives me this look of death. How was I supposed to know it would be that strong??? There's no warning in the instructions (I don't think so) about turning it all the way up. Anyways, he thinks I was trying to hurt him. Oh well.

Now back to why today was a drag. First off it's Monday, and there was nothing to do. Well nothing I wanted to do anyway. I could've called some offices and begged for paper work that we need but I hate dealing with idiots, especially doctors who act like idiots. I mean how can you be so stupid and yet you have an M.D.??? Do you know how many forms we get back, where they sign on lines that are highlighted and state "DO NOT SIGN THIS FORM!!!!" I mean, how much simpler can it be??? But yet so many of them sign it and send it back to us. Then we have to spend a month or two tracking these doctors down, trying to get the correct form from them. Imbeciles!!! And don't let me get started on the doctors at HU!!! They're in a league of their own.
Anyways, I've realized that I've said entirely too much for one day, so I'm off to watch football. GO EAGLES!!! Later bitches.

Ingredient of Love

How do we make love
and what's it truly made of
How do we make love
and what's it truly made of.

Gimme an ounce of some honesty
some innocence and a cup of loyalty
a tablespoon of some attitude
and of course a pinch of freak.

At least a pound of conversation
some attention when it comes to relation
two quarts of intelligence
and a gallon of righteousness.

What I need is a smiggen of strength and a whole lot of stamina
What I want is a liter of respect and a good damn listener

I need to feel its blended to perfection
Love is splendid
In a connection with old fashion remedies and recipes of love

And sugar, wont matter what the friends in....eat
I'll be sippin on every drop of the main ingredient
It's tasty love.

Dear Diary (pause)....thinking

Dear Diary (pause)....

Ok so not much happened today. The white van was back. The cops came out there, everyone abandoned the van, even though it was obvious what was going on. The dumbass cop stood out there for almost 20 mins doing absolutely nothing. I swear D.C. cops are crooked. Instead of going over to the van, he starts harassing some poor, harmless, old man about the way he parked. What the fuck??? Arrest somebody, don't just stand there!!!

If you don't already have it, go out and get Encore, while you're at it, pick up Crunk Juice.

Happy Birthday Goonga!!!

You're a Winter.

You very much enjoy your time alone but do like other people's company
sometimes. You just need your space. You have a few priviledged friends who saw past your
colder exterior to find the true you. You can have pretty bad mood swings (though you hate to admit it) so you could be soft one second then storming around the next! But over all, you're a very pleasant person once people take the time to get to know you. You're a good friend for in-depth talks. You're very talanted when it comes to creative things.

What season are you? (pics)
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Hi all. Just getting home from work, figured I'd post something as a way of decompressing. Its been a long day. I'm running on 4 hours of sleep. This might not seem that bad to most of you, but I need my 8 hours (this is your fault Cnot!!!! you rubbed off on me). Around noon, I thought I could sneak in some naptime, but I was called downstairs to work with the new trainee for a couple of hours. It felt so weird to be in that position, because I remember when I first started and how clueless I was. There I was, telling this 18 year old what to do, giving her advice on how to handle customers, etc. After she left for the day, I asked Sean if he liked his new aide, and his response was "She's no Marugula" (Marugula=Melinda, again don't ask about the names). I'm not even sure I spelled that correctly. Anyway, now that I'm upstairs all day, we don't talk as much and joke around anymore :-( I miss the stories, jokes, midday runs to the Georgia Ave. for patties, free lunches, I miss Wimpy. So I promised him that from now on, I'll hang out downstairs at least once a week, just to catch up.

Yesterday was also another long day. Started off the day with burning, itching, red eyes.....a few drops of Visine fixed that. Didn't really do a lot of work, spent most of the time texting people, trading stories with Barbara (my supervisor) . We're both getting bored with work, so everyday we try to come up with a method to make the day go faster. So far this week we've pranked people, played "name that tune", and reorganized file cabinets that didn't need reorganizing. We do get our work done, its just that we don't really have too much to do anymore, because we actually go to work everyday, unlike her previous assistants. We're so caught up with work, we have nothing left to do!!! Anyways, after work, I hung out with Goonga, and we went to pick up his game at midnight. Didn't get home till 1a.m., fell asleep around 2, woke up at 6.

Yesterday I also had my most embarrassing moment. I'm not going to tell you what happened. All I have to say is, I'm sure its happened to you before, and when you gotta go, you gotta go! Oh and when did we start calling each other bitches again??? I feel old and out of touch. Meh! I'm tired. Later bitches!!!

Bad news: The Eagles got trashed. There goes their winning streak. Its too depressing. Someone needs to stop the Steelers.

Good news: No more internet explorer. Get the best web browser. No more pop-ups, spyware, adware, etc. Yay!

I didn't know how much I cared until they made the announcement and I started screaming at the radio. Another 4 years of................... I'm sure you'll find tons of appropriate words to fill in the blank. So after we listened to Kerry's speech, I decided to launch my own protest. I stopped working. I sat at my desk until the day was over and did absolutely nothing. I will continue to do this for the rest of the week or however long it takes me to feel better about the situation. Why you ask??? Because I work for Republicans and I'm under-paid. So feel free to call or text me tomorrow, I will be available and at your disposal all day.

Also found out that Bean is leaving for Kentucky on Tuesday for 1-3 years. No more Beanie!!!! I'm sure he'll read this and laugh or say that I don't care that he's leaving. Even though we don't talk or see each other as much as we should, you're still a good friend and I'll miss you.

11 MORE DAYS. According to CNN thats how long we might have to wait before they can start counting the provisional ballots in Ohio. Kerry's going to win, 250,000 is a whole lot of votes. The redskins lost dammit, Kerry has to win!!! Anyway, I'm off to work, maybe by the end of the day we'll have a new pres. Later.

Don't really have the energy to say much today. Been in bed all day trying not to puke....i know, i know, tmi. Just wanted to say for those of you who can vote, please go out and do so.