today was one of those days....everything felt wrong....everything was annoying. walking through the door this morning, i just wanted to turn around, walkout, go home and curl up in bed. not because i was tired or sick, but because i didn't want to be there. i didn't want to be anywhere. sometimes you just want to escape, forget everything and everyone. i made it upstairs without snapping at anyone, and put on my headphones as soon as i sat down. the day hadn't even begun and i wanted it to be over. it got even worse at lunchtime because i was asked to do someone else's work leaving me no time to do mine, someone who's had a 6 day weekend (absent thursday, friday, and today). so today even though i'm not the praying kind, i had to say a quick one to keep my frustrations from turning into anger and to keep me from lashing out. and also to say thank you because even though its a shitty job, i have one.
now i'm home sitting here with my headphones on, blocking out the family, the phone ringing, and every other annoying sound. tomorrow i'll feel like myself again, because i have to. because tomorrow i have to call my parents and try to keep them together. because tomorrow i have to make a few calls to some family members because my uncle just died from cancer. because tomorrow i have to find some encouraging words to say to a friend who's watching his dream and everything he's worked extremely hard at fall apart. because tomorrow i have to make some calls about my school situation. because tomorrow i have too much shit to do to be mopping around.
Tuesday, May 31, 2005
Sunday, May 15, 2005
spring cleaning
i cleaned up and sorted all my boxes and shit i had packed up in the garage since i moved in. didn't realize i had so much stuff. found more books, journals, clothes, games, jewelry, pictures. things of interest that i found:
1) my original slinky - i won it as bet between goonga and i. i miss him.
2) my tweety diary from junior and senior year - can't read it though because i can't find the key to the lock and i don't want to break it.
3) my "List Your Self" book - which i have written anything in such a long time.
4) baby pictures of myself & my cousin in his stroller - now i get to tease him mercilessly because he thinks he's older than me just because he's taller.
5) an unopened box of 50 playtex super absorbency tampons- and here i've been wasting my money buying more.
6) more marks & spencers undies - thanks mom.
7) a list of requirements for my "ideal mate" (i think it was from high school)- saraha and i were bored one night on the phone and thats what we came up with. the only person so far who's met almost all of them is....goonga!
8) anne hooper's karma sutra - I FORGOT I HAD THIS!!!!!!!!!
9) money from back home (sierra leone) - which has absolutely no value here.
10) adaptor for my PS2 to watch DVDs - but since i lost the remote to the damn thing i can't use it anyway.
11) my little case of yarn - used to make bracelets for the summer.
12) pictures from korea - i thought i'd lost them.
1) my original slinky - i won it as bet between goonga and i. i miss him.
2) my tweety diary from junior and senior year - can't read it though because i can't find the key to the lock and i don't want to break it.
3) my "List Your Self" book - which i have written anything in such a long time.
4) baby pictures of myself & my cousin in his stroller - now i get to tease him mercilessly because he thinks he's older than me just because he's taller.
5) an unopened box of 50 playtex super absorbency tampons- and here i've been wasting my money buying more.
6) more marks & spencers undies - thanks mom.
7) a list of requirements for my "ideal mate" (i think it was from high school)- saraha and i were bored one night on the phone and thats what we came up with. the only person so far who's met almost all of them is....goonga!
8) anne hooper's karma sutra - I FORGOT I HAD THIS!!!!!!!!!
9) money from back home (sierra leone) - which has absolutely no value here.
10) adaptor for my PS2 to watch DVDs - but since i lost the remote to the damn thing i can't use it anyway.
11) my little case of yarn - used to make bracelets for the summer.
12) pictures from korea - i thought i'd lost them.
Sunday, May 08, 2005
untitled
i jogged and walked 4 miles today after walking up and down main st. all day yesterday....god help me in the morning.
Tuesday, May 03, 2005
Randomness 3
1. my credit card is almost paid off. now i can finally blow my money off on other things. woo hoo!!!
2. i've been waking up to the same song for the past couple of months.
3. snap, crackle, and pop died....sob sob.
4. why do all the cute guys become available when you aren't???
5. why does it feel like i've been doing sit-ups and crunchs....my muscles are sore and it hurts everytime i have to sit up.
6. so hot 99.5 is doing a MILF contest for mother's day. apparently they've been doing it for years....lol....can they even say MILF on the radio??? I can just imagine the little kids now, "mommy what's a MILF?"
7. so noone believes the whole tom cruise- katie holmes thing...so they might not be dating. i know noone cares.
8. why is it so cold outside??? ITS MAY!!! and everything's covered in frost. i hate spring.
i have more to add to the list but then people will begin to think that i'm weird....lol....enjoy the frost bitches!!!
2. i've been waking up to the same song for the past couple of months.
3. snap, crackle, and pop died....sob sob.
4. why do all the cute guys become available when you aren't???
5. why does it feel like i've been doing sit-ups and crunchs....my muscles are sore and it hurts everytime i have to sit up.
6. so hot 99.5 is doing a MILF contest for mother's day. apparently they've been doing it for years....lol....can they even say MILF on the radio??? I can just imagine the little kids now, "mommy what's a MILF?"
7. so noone believes the whole tom cruise- katie holmes thing...so they might not be dating. i know noone cares.
8. why is it so cold outside??? ITS MAY!!! and everything's covered in frost. i hate spring.
i have more to add to the list but then people will begin to think that i'm weird....lol....enjoy the frost bitches!!!
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