breathe

today was one of those days....everything felt wrong....everything was annoying. walking through the door this morning, i just wanted to turn around, walkout, go home and curl up in bed. not because i was tired or sick, but because i didn't want to be there. i didn't want to be anywhere. sometimes you just want to escape, forget everything and everyone. i made it upstairs without snapping at anyone, and put on my headphones as soon as i sat down. the day hadn't even begun and i wanted it to be over. it got even worse at lunchtime because i was asked to do someone else's work leaving me no time to do mine, someone who's had a 6 day weekend (absent thursday, friday, and today). so today even though i'm not the praying kind, i had to say a quick one to keep my frustrations from turning into anger and to keep me from lashing out. and also to say thank you because even though its a shitty job, i have one.

now i'm home sitting here with my headphones on, blocking out the family, the phone ringing, and every other annoying sound. tomorrow i'll feel like myself again, because i have to. because tomorrow i have to call my parents and try to keep them together. because tomorrow i have to make a few calls to some family members because my uncle just died from cancer. because tomorrow i have to find some encouraging words to say to a friend who's watching his dream and everything he's worked extremely hard at fall apart. because tomorrow i have to make some calls about my school situation. because tomorrow i have too much shit to do to be mopping around.